Valentine’s Day is fast approaching. Red hearts, candy, and flowers are everywhere. It is on television, in the grocery store, and at the florist shop. Everyone has a sweetheart, but you. Heartache got you down?
If you wrote a letter to your lonely heart, I’ll bet it would look something like this:
Hello Heartache,
Seems every year at Valentine’s Day, you and I meet up for a pity party. Love is on the brain and in the heart. I feel like no one loves me. Since COVID struck, I have been out of circulation. I’m lonely. I wait for someone to come into my life, but time slips by. Here I am, still by myself. It’s as if love is a game of musical chairs, and I have been left out. If I am loved, I feel undeserving.
Thanks.
You’re such a good listener!
Sincerely,
You
Want a Change? Let’s rewrite the letter. It could be something like:
Dear Lonely Heart,
While you and I have been close friends for some time, change is in the works. I have felt your pain and anguish, and have reached a decision. I want something different. I want to be happy, contented, and satisfied. I realize to be loved, I need to love myself first.
Since I don’t know what loving myself feels like, or even looks like, this will be a new adventure for both of us. I know you think it’s selfish to love myself. But I am discovering it’s the foundation of being who I truly am. It will add to my day and won’t be an extra burden.
Loving myself is a way of being, of living unstuck. Instead of wallowing in self-pity, let’s be kind and ask, “How am I feeling right now?” Then we’ll stick around for the answer. Rather than beating myself up, I will have an attitude of curiosity and compassion to hear what’s going on inside. I am willing to listen and care about the whisper of my heart, and to keep myself company like the closest friend ever.
Thanks for helping me embrace this new way of life.
With love,
You
Stuck on where to start? Here are some tips:
Want to start healing that lonely heart? Having over 35 years of experience, Joan Courtney is a clinical hypnotherapist and NLP practitioner. You can find more of her articles in Outdoors Southwest, published here on the Mountain. She is also a ghostwriter for bi-weekly posts inspired by her Canine Executive Officer, MacDuff.